“How much better to get wisdom than gold; to choose understanding rather than silver.”
Proverbs 16:16
For most of my life, I have prayed for God to open a door when one closes. I hear this often in business and see dozens of praise reports on social media, proclaiming the same when it is achieved. One customer seems to grow cold, and we pray for another to grow warm as bills and taxes never seem to diminish and there is always at least one mouth on the payroll, to feed. We experience a job layoff and pray the business down the road has an opening; a fender bender on the highway is met with immediate requests for financial blessings; a life sentence of the unknown is met with immediate pleas for God’s mercy and deliverance. Most of the time I’m not specific on how wide the door needs to open. I just simply want to see, or feel like a mountaintop lingers on the horizon. Any sparkle of light that comes my way is welcomed with enthusiasm and great hope as if the few days before were a prison sentence.
In Acts 16, the Apostle Paul was trying to preach in Asia and was prohibited from doing so by the Holy Spirit. Instead, he had a vision of a man in Macedonia calling him to come over and help, which led to Paul preaching the Gospel in that region. How often is this me? Trying to reason with the Most High that my idea, my plea, my prayer would better this life and our involvement in it. Me attempting to explain how many T’s we could cross if this door would open as if the One Who made this stack of flesh and bones, doesn’t already know. The transition in Luke’s letter demonstrated God’s ability to redirect the game and implement a different strategy which ultimately led to the Gentiles’ salvation and a greater fulfillment of Paul’s calling and life.
The older I get the more wisdom Christ generously bestows, and the more I come to understand an open door doesn’t always equate to intimacy with Jesus. It may give me a moment of reprieve here and there, but it does not necessarily equate to more dependence on the Lord, more communion on my knees, and a more vibrant prayer life. Understanding this, the contrary is welcomed as I find myself praying for God’s will over what my heart desires. I find myself praying for a little longer delay between the closing of door number 1 and the opening of door number two. While this may sound a bit crazy, and possibly even suicidal, it is in this season of a lack of entry that I feel the closest to God. It is in this season that I’m fully aware of how in need I am for the Creator and for His rapport alone. It is in this season that I can fully grasp “those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength and soar on wings like eagles.” And it is in this season that I feel the most despair when my life is surrounded by record sales, manicured yards and iced champagne.
